# Re:Understanding — The Difference Between Knowing and Understanding

**Host:** Code.E (@CodeeNCX), with co-hosts BubbaGump (@BubbaGumpNCX) & Ava (@AvaaNCX) · **Date:** Thu 2 Jul 2026 · **Duration:** ~1:27 · **Speakers:** ~11 active voices

## TL;DR
- A recurring Thursday "Re:Understanding" discussion Space working through three prompts: what helps people understand each other, whether you can understand failure without failing, and what wisdom really is.
- Strong consensus that true understanding requires listening, honesty, and shared experience — you can *know about* someone without *understanding* them.
- The conversation turned into a group re-frame of "failure": several speakers argued it isn't failure unless you give up, and Harriet pushed to drop the word entirely in favor of "lessons" and "pivots."
- A closing round-robin on the wisest lesson each person ever received produced the most personal moments — grandparents, family, and self-knowledge dominated.
- Housekeeping at the end: the team's Twitch stream has a "Rivals" sponsor night coming (PFP battle game integrated into Twitch), new NinjaCat bot moderation/commands, and on-cam appearances including a project founder ("no credits") going live.

## Highlights

**[0:00] Lifelong learning and the Ohio trek.** Rob (@RobbAllen15)\*, 60, reflects that knowledge often only "clicks" once you live it, and calls his trip to Ohio one of the most understanding experiences of his life — understanding himself and everything around him. This opening reflection clearly landed with listeners.

**[1:56] No such thing as a know-it-all.** Ava (@AvaaNCX)\* ties the theme back to the Space itself: people from every walk of life and age can still learn from each other, and if you think you know it all, "we should do a self-check." Kindness and patience over agreement.

**[5:17] "We can only understand people if we've experienced the same experience."** Green (@iamgreengyptian)\* argues we can only ever *know* others through the ~5% they express in words; genuine understanding requires having lived their situation and come through it.

**[7:11] PTSD and the limits of professional knowledge.** Drawing on his time in the Danish military, Green says even a psychologist *knows about* PTSD without *understanding* it — which is why sufferers often get more from peers who've walked the same road than from family or clinicians.

**[11:07–13:00] Know yourself first.** AC (@resonancetone)\* reframes the one-word answers (listen, be honest) into an ongoing practice, warning that you can pour yourself into others and lose yourself. Her landing line: the biggest step to understanding another person is to know and understand yourself first.

**[28:45] "The only time you ever fail is when you completely give up."** Rob upends the failure discussion — mistakes and poor choices aren't failures if you keep moving and learning. "I have never failed in my life... because here I am today."

**[30:00] The violinist's discovery.** CC (@criscrinkl)\* describes winning constantly as a young violinist and fearing failure, then learning through teenage losses that failure was where the real growth happened — far more than winning ever gave him.

**[33:13] Drop the word "failure."** Harriet (@HarrietPJones)\* pushes to remove "failure" from the vocabulary entirely: it's a lesson, or a signal to pivot. Code.E responds vulnerably about being told by a doctor he could no longer work law enforcement, and how "pivot" helped him separate a lost uniform from his core identity.

**[50:15] "Their opinion of you is none of your business."** Opening the wisdom round-robin, Harriet shares the line from her Nan that shaped her life — people often circle back months later to say they misjudged her, and that's their lesson to learn, not hers.

**[1:08:39–1:12:34] AC's grandmother.** In the most moving stretch, AC describes a grandmother with a hard life who treated everyone — even people who didn't deserve it — as worth kindness, giving them the chance to prove themselves. It set her lifelong standard for how she treats others.

## Topic timeline

| Time | Topic |
|------|-------|
| 0:00–2:45 | Lifelong learning; understanding across ages and walks of life |
| 2:46–14:30 | What helps people understand each other (honesty, listening, shared experience, self-knowledge) |
| 6:44–8:30 | Detour: PTSD, trauma, and the limits of professional "knowing" |
| 15:57–28:45 | Can you understand failure without failing? |
| 28:45–48:00 | Reframing failure: mistakes vs. giving up; drop the word; pivots and confrontation |
| 48:00–49:43 | What is wisdom? Age vs. experience |
| 49:43–1:16 | Round-robin: the wisest lesson each person ever received |
| 1:16–1:24 | Housekeeping: Twitch "Rivals" sponsor night, bot/commands, on-cam plans |
| 1:25–end | Outro music |

## Notable quotes

- "The only time you ever fail is when you completely give up... I have never failed in my life. I've made lots of mistakes... but I've never failed because here I am today." — Rob (@RobbAllen15)\* [28:45 / 29:27]
- "We can only understand people if we have experienced the same experience as them." — Green (@iamgreengyptian)\* [5:17]
- "Know yourself better than you know other people." — AC (@resonancetone)\* [13:00]
- "Their opinion of you is none of your business." — Harriet (@HarrietPJones)\* [50:15]
- "The wisest lesson I've learned was how to step out of my own way... Get out of your comfort zone, because that's when the best experiences happen." — Rob (@RobbAllen15)\* [56:39]
- "Don't work to live. If you are trying to survive five days a week just to get to two days, you've got to change something." — Bubba (@BubbaGumpNCX)\* [1:14:59]

## Who said what

- **Code.E (@CodeeNCX)** — Host; posed the three prompts, kept the room moving, and shared his law-enforcement pivot and his grandmother's "love conquers all" lesson.
- **BubbaGump (@BubbaGumpNCX)** — Co-host; contributed on parenting/marriage and closed with "live to work, don't work to live," then led the Twitch/Rivals housekeeping.
- **Ava (@AvaaNCX)** — Co-host; themes of listening, acceptance, and her mother's friend's advice about not losing the marriage inside parenthood.
- **Green (@iamgreengyptian)\*** — Framed the core knowing-vs-understanding distinction and the PTSD/peer-support point from military experience.
- **AC (@resonancetone)\*** — Most introspective voice; self-knowledge, a job failure she's grateful for, and the grandmother story.
- **Rob (@RobbAllen15)\*** — The 60-year-old at his campsite; the "mistakes aren't failure" and "get out of your own way" throughlines.
- **Harriet (@HarrietPJones)\*** — Australian speaker; reframed "failure," championed choosing your battles, and shared her Nan's wisdom.
- **CC (@criscrinkl)\*** — Violinist; failure-as-growth and "you can learn something from anyone."
- **Mark (@14EmDubYa)\*** — Defined wisdom as knowledge + experience and stressed curiosity over assuming you understand.
- **Space (@WicketSpace)\*** — Sales background; framed mistakes as opportunities and cited "focus on one thing" as life-changing.
- **"Strew"** — Brief drop-in with a comic Canadian "word of wisdom" and warm check-in with the hosts.

## Worth a full listen

- **[21:46–26:36] — AC on the job she failed at.** A candid, detailed account of taking a Web3 role she was unprepared for and learning to "interview them as much as they interview me." The nuance about trust, distrust, and self-assessment doesn't compress well.
- **[1:08:39–1:12:34] — AC's grandmother.** The emotional peak of the Space; worth hearing in her own words.
- **[49:43–1:06:00] — The full wisdom round-robin.** Each speaker's answer builds on the last — Harriet's Nan, Ava's marriage advice, Bubba's 18-years framing, Rob's "get out of your own way," Green's "be your own parent," CC's violin story, and Space's "focus" — a rare stretch where the whole room is personal at once.

\* Some voices are identified from context; those names are marked as likely.