Re:Invigorate With Woof — "Breakfast With Woof: Pass the Bacon" 🥓

Host: Woof (@WoofArmyXX) with cohosts Meow (@MeowMetaX) and Margie B (@MargieAponte2) · Sun, Sept 27 · 1:55:51 · ~10 speakers

TL;DR

• Woof returns from a long stretch of night shifts; the room mostly uses the reunion to roast him. He's on days for four, then off seven [22:17].
• Meow gives a full report on her first-ever college football game (WVU vs. Oklahoma), band, tailgate, porta-potty logistics and all [16:31].
• A recap bot apparently described Meow as Woof's daughter, which becomes the show's longest-running bit [7:21].
• Meow reaches for "carbonated," says "carbon monoxide," and the entire Space adopts it permanently [34:15].
• Lyss (@Lysss302) arrives at maximum Buffalo Bills voltage on two hours of sleep and effectively takes the wheel; Jed (@jed_131) provides the running counterpoint [14:42].
• Jed announces a $1 open edition, proceeds going to the person who stopped the recent Ape exploit, plus regen giveaways [1:38:00].
• Next Friday's Space: Starbucks vs. Dunkin' vs. Tim Hortons, broadcast live from outside a Starbucks [1:53:57].

Highlights

[3:01] Margie B's New York roll-delivery economy. A nor'easter, a cold that "gets into your bones," and a trip to the supermarket for a roll. Woof asks if she has a roll guy who just walks around, which sets Margie B up perfectly: "There's nobody on the street. It's like drugs. I got crack, I got rolls, I got coke, I got weed." Puerto Rico, she notes, genuinely did have a bakery truck and a produce truck.

[10:31] Weird news. A Waymo wandered into a Denver farmers market ("How do you argue with a car when nobody's driving it?"), Wendy's released an emo album for parking-lot listening, and a Colorado man went to Reddit to find a girlfriend for his zebra tarantula before it dies a virgin. Margie B's follow-up on the Florida road-rage vegan mayonnaise is the one that sticks [13:52]: how did she have a glass jar of it so handy — was she making a sandwich while driving?

[16:31] Meow's first game. Styrofoam clappers, the "Let's go Mountaineers" call-and-response across the stadium, the WVU first-down chant she had never heard, and the band — she was in marching band, played sax, appreciated the flag corps, and described the formations as "little ants." Also: Woof beeping at the metal detector because of his leg, and a bourbon ad with a dog running the entire length of the LED ring, which she watched loop four times.

[32:10] The man beer crusade. Woof's chief disappointment with modern tailgating is that 90% of people are drinking light beer. He worked his way down a cooler of IC Light, Busch Light, Michelob and Coors Light before someone produced a Coors Banquet — at which point he complained that it was non-union.

[34:15] "Carbon monoxide." Meow, describing the little 12-ounce vodka spritzers, gropes for the word "carbonated" and lands on "carbon monoxide." BeeCuzFuture is immediately on it — "you gotta be careful with those carbon monoxide drinks, they'll sneak up on you" — and Meow doubles down with "you can't even smell them." It stays in circulation for the rest of the Space, eventually reaching her Puerto Rican chicken soup diagnosis and her own closing remarks.

[43:19] Starbies. Woof will type it in a post but refuses to say it out loud — "no self-respecting straight man says Starbies, because it's Starbucks" — while Lyss, Meow and JB cheerfully bury him. Lyss explains the venti caramel macchiato with an extra shot, upside down [46:52], then offers to buy Gunn one on the spot; Gunn declines on the grounds that his last one gave him too much energy for four days.

[49:20] Why is it called Rebucks? BeeCuzFuture's theory: Starbucks. Jed's correction, delivered with feeling [50:04]: "First of all, it had to do a V-Bucks, you uncultured swine. V-Bucks from Fortnite." He then diagnoses Lyss with "proof of crack" and starts requesting a Tylenol. Woof's position on the hosting question is that a good host goes with the flow.

[1:20:43] The soup. Lyss made Jed Puerto Rican chicken soup for the first time, having been fed by the restaurant for ten months, and was genuinely nervous about it. Jed, live and unprompted: he'd been braced to fake a five out of ten and gave it an 8.6. Lyss follows with the sincerest stretch of the morning [1:23:19] — cooking as the way her mother and grandmother showed love, and the second bowl as the highest compliment. Margie B's contribution is that the soup obviously contained carbon monoxide.

[1:27:29] The bodybuilder defense. Jed pivots to "Did I just hear Meow say she does not cook for Wolf?" and leans into it deliberately until Meow mounts her defense [1:30:57]: "Have you ever tried to feed a bodybuilder? Do you know what they eat?" BeeCuzFuture offers the practical solution — twenty pounds of bland bullshit — and Margie B holds the line on Meow's behalf throughout.

[1:38:00] The mint. Jed shifts gears to announce a $1 open edition for the person who stopped the Ape exploit, with all profits going to him, plus regens given away alongside. His read: with the stolen apes and the loaned ones potentially hitting the market, the knock-on selling could have been the worst extinction-level event NFTs have seen, and a dollar is the least anyone can do.

[1:46:58] The kiss during the scoring drive. Meow recalls early in their dating days leaning in for a kiss mid-play and being physically shooed away. Margie B is outraged on her behalf; Lyss sides firmly with Woof; Ryan delivers the procedural ruling [1:51:25]: "You go in for that kiss at commercial break. Definitely not when there's like a play going."

Topic timeline

Notable quotes

• "There's nobody on the street. It's like drugs. I got crack, I got rolls, I got coke, I got weed." — Margie B [3:01]
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  0:38
• "A driverless car hits your tomato stand. Who do you yell at?" — Woof [10:31]
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  0:38
• "It was carbonated, it didn't have carbon monoxide in it, I promise." — Meow [34:15]
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  0:38
• "First of all, it had to do a V-Bucks, you uncultured swine." — Jed [50:04]
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  0:38
• "I thought this was gonna suck, but it's so good." — Lyss, quoting Jed on the soup [1:25:37]
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  0:38
• "Have you ever tried to feed a bodybuilder? Anyone? Do you know what they eat?" — Meow [1:30:57]
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  0:38

Who said what

• Woof (@WoofArmyXX) — host, back after a long run of night shifts; ran weird news, defended regular-strength beer, refused to say "Starbies" aloud, and absorbed roughly two hours of affectionate abuse.
• Meow (@MeowMetaX) — cohost; the game report was hers end to end, as was the accidental coinage that ran the rest of the Space.
• Margie B (@MargieAponte2) — cohost; weather, rolls, terrible dad jokes, and Meow's most reliable defender in every dispute.
• Lyss (@Lysss302) — arrived at full Bills-Sunday throttle on two hours of sleep, ran the engagement calls, talked De Stefano's and regen community, and shared the soup story.
• Jed (@jed_131) — the counterweight, requesting Tylenol and volume reduction; also delivered the V-Bucks origin story, the 8.6 soup rating, and the mint announcement.
• BeeCuzFuture (@BeeCuzFuture) — best straight-man of the morning on the carbon monoxide bit, plus the Rebucks/Starbucks theory and a genuinely sweet note about the pizza his wife left warming in the oven [1:28:51].
• Ryan (@RyanJ8812) — Mr. Two Sentences, every time, including the definitive ruling on kiss timing.
• Gunn (@_justGunn) — Eagles PFP; asked Lyss whether she's part French given how she says "Bills," and self-banned from Starbucks.
• JB (@jbro_1776) — the lone Patriots fan, gracious about it ("I had my winnings"), and offered a real analysis of Bills coaching at [1:44:06].

Worth a full listen

• [16:31]–[32:10] — Meow's full game recap. The summary can't carry the detail: the band, the bourbon-ad dog, the mystery penalty where the refs decided the defense wasn't ready, and the crowd behind them relitigating it.
• [1:20:43]–[1:27:26] — The soup arc, from Jed's honest review through Lyss on cooking as love language and into Ryan's quiet agreement. It's the warmest stretch of the morning and it's funny throughout.
• [43:19]–[53:29] — The Starbies/Rebucks/jersey run, where five separate bits are in the air simultaneously and nobody lets any of them land.